...Writings from all kinds of fandoms...

Ashes in the Wind by Alvina

Rated: NC17

[Reviews: 1]

Harry Potter defeated Voldemort after his fifth year. Being expelled from Hogswarts he flees to America where he meets the Cullens. Will he be able to start a new life or will his past catch up with him?

Categories : Fanfictions Twilight, Fanfictions Harry Potter

Character : Edward Cullen, Harry Potter

Pairings : Edward/Harry, Harry/Edward

Genre : Drama, Romance, Slash

Warnings : Explicit sexual content, Male/Male relationship(s)

Chapters : 21

Completed : Yes

Word count : 61.502

Read count: 0


Published: September 1, 2019

Updated: September 1, 2019

Ashes in the Wind Chapter 17

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Harry hugged C.J. close to his chest as he stepped outside and closed his eyes. It felt good to be back. After his talk with Snape he'd gone back to the Diggorys where he'd picked up C.J. and then had travelled back to America. Snape decided he would stay in Britain and find out what Dumbledore was up to so he could warn Harry. Harry didn't know what it was about America but he somehow felt freer here.

This very morning he had written a letter to Remus Lupin to give him the deeds to Grimmauld Place. He wanted to cut all ties with the British Wizarding World and the last thing he needed to do was send the deeds to Remus for he wanted nothing to do with that creepy place. He was more than glad to be rid of it.

He had closed his eyes when he stepped outside and when he opened them he noticed Edward had laid out a blanket on the ground and had placed some toys for C.J. on it. He smiled when he caught the vampire's eye. "Morning Harrison," the vampire greeted him. "Did you sleep well?"

Harry nodded and put C.J. down. "Yes, good thing I didn't sleep much in Britain otherwise I would have gotten jet-lag."

The vampire chuckled as he sat down besides the small family; watching them as Harry played with his son. Ever since Britain something had bugged him but he hadn't known how to bring it up.

When they were at the Diggory's house, Cedric – Harrison's old boyfriend or husband as Harrison liked to call him – had visited them. He wasn't quite sure how since Cedric was dead. However, the mere presence of his former boyfriend had somehow made a change in Harrison. He was more at ease with everything, now. Sure the presence of his former headmaster still lingered on the front of his mind but there was also a certain calm around him. As if he found peace at least. Maybe he had. Cedric did give him permission to love again and to move on with his life.

"Harrison," Edward began.

Harry turned towards the vampire, a smile lingering on his lips.

"There's something that has been bothering me," he continued. "Something I wanted to ask you." His own topaz eyes locked with Harrison's green ones. "In Britain, at the Diggory's, you said that Cedric is C.J.'s father." Harry gave him a small nod. "And from your actions and thoughts I get the impression he's been the only one for you." Another nod followed. "I don't understand–who is his mother?"

"I am," Harry replied, voice thick with emotion. Although he'd never been ashamed that he had carried C.J. for nine months in the womb, he knew it wasn't something that happened every day. Men just didn't get pregnant. That is, unless you are a wizard…

Harry broke the stare and turned his attention back on C.J. who had started crawling towards the edge of the blanket as he picked some grass. "I met Cedric during my third year. We played a game of Quidditch against each other's houses and they'd won. That year the Dementors were guarding our school. Whenever the Dementors are close I can hear my mother's screams as she died protecting me because Dementors drain away all your happiness and leave you with only your worst memories. During that game the Dementors were there. I fell off my broom and ended up in the hospital wing.'

"Cedric didn't know what had happened to me and caught the Snitch, resulting in them winning the game. He had felt so bad about it that he came to see me in the hospital wing."

Harry could remember that day clearly. His friends had just told him that the Whomping Willow had broken his beloved Nimbus 2000, the pieces still shattered on his bed. He had been so angry, not at the Whomping Willow but at himself. Why did I have such a powerful reaction to the Dementors? Why didn't anyone else faint? He had thrown the pieces of his beloved Nimbus 2000 around the room in anger and resentment.

"I felt as if I had lost my best friend that day," Harry remembered that feeling all too well.

He had just laid back in self misery when Cedric had walked in. He had apologised and told him he'd be willing to do a rematch but Harry had told him not to worry about it. He'd won the game fair and square. The next few moments had been rather awkward for neither boy knew what to say but soon the silence was broken as they started talking about Quidditch. That day had been the start of their friendship.

"During my fourth year we became rather close. I could tell him everything, from my fears to my dreams. Never once did he judge me. He became my confidant. There really wasn't anything I didn't tell him.'

"The day after our first kiss, I freaked out."

Harry remembered how confused he had been. It was wrong to like a boy, wasn't it? His aunt had always looked with disgust when they'd see two men together and his uncle would always say they were ‘queer', ‘poofter', ‘faggot' or ‘fairy'. He never had liked those words. At the time he may not have known what they meant but he knew it was something bad and something you'd never want to be. That was until he'd talked to Cedric about it.

"I was taught to believe liking boys is wrong and I didn't know how to tell anyone this. At first I tried to deny it but it soon came apparent that I liked boys or at least one boy.'

"Cedric taught me how love was love and that if you loved someone it was a beautiful thing. It didn't matter what sex they have. I remember that conversation clearly."

~*~*~*~*~

"Harry, what's wrong?" Seventeen year old Cedric Diggory asked fourteen year old Harry Potter. Last night they had shared their first kiss and it had felt wonderful. Over the last few weeks he'd started developing feelings for young Harry and he had been rather ecstatic when they'd kissed but now Harry was pulling away from him. Had something happened?

"I feel as if I'm losing you," Cedric admitted after a few moments when the younger boy stayed quiet. "If I did something wrong, please tell me. I don't want to lose you."

"You did nothing wrong," Harry quickly told him but didn't elaborate.

"Tell me," Cedric probed. "Maybe I can help."

Harry felt silent once more. He opened his mouth a few times but no sound came out.

Cedric felt a pang shoot through his heart. Harry had never been unable to tell him anything. He'd confided in him about the emotional and physical abuse those awful muggles had put him through. He also told him about the neglect. Why would that be easier than what was bothering him now? He'd finally given up hope that Harry would confide in him as he gazed down the lake when he heard a small voice ask a question.

"My relatives taught me it was wrong for two boys to kiss," Harry began. "Is it wrong?"

It finally dawned on him what was bothering his young friend. Those awful muggles had filled the poor boy's head with so much rubbish and he actually believed most of it. He shook his head. "No, there's nothing wrong with it."

"How do you know you like someone?" The next question was innocent and it reminded the older boy how young Harry actually was. Most of the time Harry acted many years his senior but sometimes he would act his real age, sometimes even younger.

"I guess you'd just know," Cedric replied, shook his head and tried to give a better answer. "You'd know because every moment you're not together with that person you'd wish you were together or you'd think about that person. Just a glimpse of this person would make your day. You'd do anything to make that person smile and hope he'd never have a bad day for if he did; all you'd want to do is take him in your arms and kiss the pain away. You'd know because your heart tells you it's right."

Harry swallowed. He'd noticed the specific use of pronoun but didn't comment on it. "And how do you know that that person likes you as well?"

Cedric sighed. "I guess the only way you can be sure is when you ask that person how they feel about you."

A comfortable silence fell over the two boys as they took in the words. Harry turned his head as he thought about what Cedric had said when you'd know you like someone. He'd said that you'd know when all you wanted to do was make that person smile and not cause him pain. When he'd seen the hurt in the Hufflepuff's eyes, he'd felt a stab at his heart. He had been the cause of that hurt and it broke his heart. He'd never wanted to hurt Cedric. When Cedric turned to him and gave him a small smile he'd felt butterflies in the pit of his stomach. He looked away when he felt his face heat up.

"Cedric?" he asked after he licked his dry lips.

"Mmm?" Cedric had been lost in thought, contemplating his own words and only now did he notice how close the two of them were.

"If that person smiles at you, can it make your heart beat faster?" Harry was certain the Hufflepuff could hear his heartbeat.

Cedric smiled at the innocent question. "Yes," he simply answered.

Harry picked up Cedric's hand and placed it against his heart. "My heart's beating really fast."

Cedric swallowed, the meaning behind the words was heard loud and clear but he still needed to know what Harry was really talking about.

"It's you I think about every minute of every hour of every day. I'd never want to see you hurt. You're smile can light up even the crappiest day. All I can think about is the kiss we shared and how much I want to kiss you again…"

Their eyes locked and before Harry knew it the older boy had pulled him close and crushed their lips together in an exploring, breathtaking kiss.

~*~*~*~*~

"But I was a little skittish about it still so I asked Cedric to keep it quiet. He had agreed and we just kept seeing each other in secret.'

"The time I spend with him was the happiest of my life." Memories of their time together flashed before his eyes. "We were young but somehow we knew we were meant to be together. In the wizardry world you need witnesses to become engaged so Cedric asked me to marry him like a muggle. He told me how much he loved me and how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. He even went down on one knee, pulled out a ring and asked me to marry him."

Just as the words left Harry's mouth a ring appeared on his finger, one Edward had never seen before.

"We put an invisible spell on it. Only those who know about it can see it." Harry fingered the ring. "I haven't been able to take it off yet." Harry took a deep breath before he continued his story. "The night before the third task we felt as if we were going to lose something. Although it wasn't legal to the law it was to us, that night we pledges ourselves to each other. We carved a letter into each other's shoulder." He lowered his shirt to show Edward a carved ‘C'.

"We shared that night together," his eyes fell on his son, as if to say that he was the result of their night. "Then he was taken away from me." Pain filled his heart. "I was in shock for weeks. So when I got sick I figured it was because of the shock but when the symptoms didn't disappear I started to look them up in a medical book."

Harry remembered the nights he'd spend at Grimmauld Place going through every muggle medical book he could find.

"I found that a pregnant woman shared the same symptoms I had but decided that was not my case, for how could a male get pregnant? Yet, my symptoms didn't disappear nor did I find anything else so I started searching the wizarding books and to my shock found out wizards can get pregnant."

The moment he realised he was pregnant he'd actually fainted but, once he was conscious again, he had seen it as a blessing. Now he was going to have the family he'd always wanted or at least part of it.

"In the book they mentioned a potion that could determine whether you're pregnant or not. I wanted the confirmation so I looked at my options. I wasn't going to tell my friends for they didn't even know I was gay. I couldn't tell Sirius or the Headmaster this. I didn't want them to be disappointed by me. So, I looked to the only person who couldn't think any less of me.'

"I told you that Severus and I didn't see quite eye to eye," a small nod confirmed him. "But I knew that he was the only one who could help me and that wasn't only because he's a potion master. I asked him to help me out but not before making a vow between the two of us that stated that he couldn't tell anyone about this to those who don't know about it. He agreed and made the potion. It turned out that I was pregnant…"

Harry picked his son up when he started to crawl towards him. "What are you doing?" he asked him and smiled when C.J. reached out to him. He placed him in his lap as he continued his story. "We had to include Poppy but I didn't want too many people knowing about this."

"How did you hide your condition?"

"Glamour," Harry replied. "We made it look like I was before I got pregnant."

Harry remembered when he had gained some weight and how he had to hide this from his friends. He had to make awkward turns. Quidditch was hell, although it was his only outlet he was grateful he had been banned from it by Umbridge. That way he wouldn't have to come up with excuses not to go to practise for fear of them finding out he was pregnant or worse, fear of losing his child.

"Poppy was placed under the same vow and together, the two of them made sure I was looked after during my time at Hogwarts.'

"When C.J. was ready to be born, we had to sneak out of Hogwarts. Luckily there was a Hogsmeade weekend and we were able to sneak out easily. We went to the Diggory's, hoping they would help us. Not to mention, we figured it was the best spot. No one knew about my relationship with Cedric so no one would know C.J. was mine."

Harry remembered clearly showing up at the Diggory's very pregnant. He could barely stand on his own and was leaning heavily against the potion master. He'd explained how Cedric and he had bonded and had shared a night together. Though the Diggory's were a little offended, because their son would never go against the vows. It was then that he showed them his ring and the mark on his left shoulder.

"We made vows and in our hearts they were legal, that's all we needed to know," Harry had said before screaming out in pain. His child wanted to be brought into the world now.

The Diggory's had promised to help out as much as they could. The hardest thing Harry had to do was leave C.J. with them hours after he'd been born but he was able to visit him whenever he wanted.

Snape and he made a plan. He'd try and get a detention, not that he'd have to try hard with Snape for he still treated him as he always had, mostly to keep his cover. He'd Floo over to the Diggory's using Snape's floo and spend an hour or two there and then another hour in detention with Snape. This way neither would get into trouble.

"I don't know how but we pulled it off. No one there knows I have a child and I'd like to keep it that way," Harry ended his story.

While Harrison had been remembering his past life, Edward had seen it with him. He'd been a little shocked to find out that Harrison had actually carried and given birth to C.J. but he'd seen the day as if he was there. Poppy had cut open his abdomen and carefully removed him from the womb, cleaned the babe up and then stitched Harrison back together. He'd felt as if he had been there.

He'd watch how Poppy had placed the babe in his arms. The huge smile that occupied his face from the gesture. Edward had never seen Harry smile like that before. It was something he wanted to see on his face all the time and he was going to make sure Harry had more things to smile about.

As he watched the memories play in Harrison's mind he felt the beast, deep inside him, roar. It was angry that someone else had touched his Harrison. Yet, he couldn't stay jealous after knowing so much about Harrison. It was easy to love this young man and to know that he had been through so much pain and suffering; any happy memory was a gift for him.

"Stop that C.J.," Harry's voice filled the silence. C.J. was trying to pull his hair out. "You are a naughty little man, aren't you?" He picked C.J. up from his lap and proceeded to lay him down in front of him. Then he started to tickle him.

C.J. squealed in delight. He'd felt that his daddy was feeling sad and tried to make him feel better. He hadn't wanted to hurt his daddy but he'd been trying to get his daddy's attention for a while now and the only thing that seemed to work was pulling his hair.

"Dada, happy?" He asked when his daddy stopped tickling him. He wanted to know if he had succeeded making his daddy happy again. He really didn't like feeling his daddy's sadness.

"He's an empath?" Edward had heard Harry say this once before but he'd never seen the youngster at work.

Harry nodded. "He seems really in tune with my feelings."

"He wanted to know if he'd succeeded in making you happy. He doesn't like seeing you sad," Edward told him after reading the youngster's thoughts.

"I'm very happy, little man," Harry told his son as he picked him back up and sat him down in his lap again. "Seems like he only picks up on my feelings."

"Eddy, happy?" C.J.'s voice was heard, cutting his father off. He'd felt Eddy's sadness and angriness as well.

"And he surprises me once again," Harry said while laughing. "I guess he's in tune with your feelings as well." This could only mean he sees you as family as well.

"I'm very happy, dear one," Edward told C.J. as he picked him up when the youngster reached out to him. C.J. cooed happily as he felt the love wash over him from both his Daddy and his Eddy.

Harry looked at Edward as the vampire communicated with his son and smiled. When Cedric had visited him on his birthday he'd been so happy to see him. Nothing mattered to him anymore for Cedric was once more with him. But then he'd remembered his growing feelings for Edward and he'd felt so guilty. There was a time when he'd promised Cedric that he'd be the only one and there he was growing rather close to another person.

On his birthday, however, Cedric had given him his blessings. He hadn't realised it back then but now it was crystal clear. His husband had given him permission to move on and he knew exactly with whom. If only he dared to ask him…

"Who do you want to ask what?" Edward's voice broke through his musings.

He'd forgotten that the vampire was able to read his mind. A blush covered his face as he looked away. How do people do it? How do you ask someone you like out on a date? He closed his eyes when he heard Edward's chuckle. He had read his thoughts, again.

Edward looked at the wizard with a smile on his face. Harrison wanted to ask someone out but didn't know how to do that? "Why don't you just try it?" He suggested, although he felt a feeling of dread, he figured it was best to calm the embarrassed wizard down. "Practice on me."

Harry's head shot up, a horrified look on his face. "No!" He practically shouted. "I mean, I don't need to practice." He once more lowered his head, mortified.

Silence fell over the small group. Harry licked his dry lips, thankful Edward's attention was back on C.J. "Do you mind it that I can read your mind?" Edward's voice broke through his musings.

Harry took a moment to reply. Most of the times he didn't mind that Edward was able to hear his thoughts, sometimes he was even grateful for that way they could communicate without anyone else hearing about it; like when he asked Edward to give Severus a message. But sometimes, like when he was trying to figure things out, he wished he didn't. "Sometimes," Harry admitted. "But most of the time I rather like having you in my mind."

When the vampire cracked a smile, Harry blushed. "I sometimes wish I could turn it off as well," he admitted. "Yet, other time I am rather grateful." His eyes fell on C.J. as he heard the rambled thoughts. "C.J. doesn't like this feeling you're projecting. He's trying to figure out how to make you stop."

"Neither do I," Harry admitted. He had always hated feeling nervous. He should just get it over with, shouldn't he? His eyes landed on his son, who was babbling to himself. Sometimes he really hated Edward's ability, especially now when the vampire was able to hear what his son was thinking and he wasn't.

C.J. turned to his father. There was a new feeling coming from him. What was wrong with his daddy?

When the searching grey eyes of his son locked with his own he decided he should just get on with it. He took a deep breath, making the vampire look at him, before he asked his question. "Edward, would you liketogoonadatewithme?"

A human wouldn't have been able to decipher what Harry had asked but luckily Edward wasn't a human and had heard the question loud and clear. "I'd love to go on a date with you," he answered.

Relief shot through Harry, who knew that asking someone out could result with so much pressure? Then it hit him…what do people do on dates? Edward was smirking at him, which also didn't help. Why can't the ground just open up and swallow me whole?

"Don't worry about it," Edward told him. "I'm sure we'll have a good time."

All Harry could do was smile at him, hoping the vampire wouldn't read his troubled thoughts. He needed help and he needed it now. Another chuckle was heard and Harry couldn't contain his blush. "I'm just going to put him to bed," he said trying to put some distance between them. "Or drown myself or something…"

There was another chuckle as Harry grabbed C.J. and rushed off. It had been a long while since he had been able to be himself and all he wanted to be with Edward was himself. That included the uncertainty, embarrassment and idiocy, unfortunately.

~*~*~*~*~

Later that day he found Esme in the kitchen making dinner for him. "Esme, I need your help," he told her as he sat down. "But first Edward has to leave the house." A musical chuckle was heard and Harry knew the mind-reader had heard him.

"If you wanted me out of the house you could have just asked," Edward told him as he entered the kitchen.

"No, because then you'd ask me why and I'd think it and you'll read my mind and ruin the surprise," the wizard retorted.

Esme watched the two men interact with each other and smiled. "Jasper and Emmett will take him hunting," she told them and not a minute later the two vampires entered the kitchen.

"We'll help you out," Emmett told his youngest brother. Ever since Harrison had begun living with them he'd seen him as his brother, same for the rest of his family.

"Now, tell me what's wrong," Esme asked when the three vampires had left and she could no longer hear them.

"I asked Edward out on a date," he told her, making her smile, "but I have no idea what you do on dates."

Esme had been delighted to hear her youngest sons got along so well and now they may find they have more in common than they realised. "Well, I suppose most people go out to dinner," she replied.

"I thought so, but I don't want to do that since Edward doesn't eat." After Cedric he had been on one date and they'd gone to this tea shop, he figured that wasn't something he wanted to do with Edward. The dates he had with Cedric were planned by him and most of them were just a one-on-one Quidditch game. He wanted to do something special with Edward, something he'd like.

"What about a movie?"

"Well, I've never been to the cinema before but I want it to be special and a film just seems so impersonal, you know? Like something you'd do when you don't have any other options."

"You want something personal, something Edward will like?" Esme guessed.

"Yeah," Harry answered as he sank into one of the kitchen chairs. What would Edward like? He thought. "Music, Edward likes music."

"Why not take him to the concert hall?" Esme suggested.

"That's a good idea," Harry said and walked over to the phone to order some tickets. Half-way there, he stopped. "And then?"

Esme smiled; sometimes he was such an innocent. "Why not take a walk through the park?"

"That's a good idea!" Harry exclaimed. "Do you think Edward will like this?"

"I'm sure he will." Now that Harry's nerves were eased, he could order the tickets and look forward to their first date.

TBC

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